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(512) 250-WELL (9355) | info@ncwcaustin.com

Recovery and Parenting

Recovery does not happen in isolation. We recover in relationship with others, and here at Northwest Counseling and Wellness we start with a recovery group. That circle expands to include our families and friends, and eventually, the community at large. Each of these “families” can support you in sobriety, and may also present challenges to that sobriety on occasion. Children, in particular, have a way of being endearing and infuriating simultaneously. They have needs that only you as a parent can meet. And if these needs go unmet they will become demands, in the form of louder or more aggressive requests, acting out, and more.

Substance abuse is often characterized by rifts in relationships, including difficulty with parent-child relationships. In fact, parents in recovery often cite their children as a primary source of inspiration to get well. Using a substance may have inhibited your ability to connect with your child, as well as your child’s ability to feel securely attached to you. And being sober when confronted with the daily challenges of parenthood may bring with it a whole host of new emotions, adding to the complexities of staying sober.

In much the same way as you learn to recognize and meet your own emotional needs in the recovery process, you will need to learn (or re-learn) how to recognize and meet your child’s needs. All children need to feel secure and loved in order to thrive. Children who have a parent in recovery may also need to make sense of a relationship disrupted or altered by substance abuse, and learn to feel safe and secure with a newly sober parent. As with adult relationships that have been changed by substance use, it can take time to rebuild trust. One way to jumpstart this process is to listen. Really listen to your child, and communicate clearly that you have heard them. This takes some practice. Just as you may have learned over time to meditate and be mindful about your own feelings, you are teaching your children to be mindful by inviting them into a safe space to share those feelings with you. When they have the opportunity to access their own emotions and share them and feel understood, they develop the capacity to trust – both in you and in themselves.

Try listening for the feeling in something your child shares with you. “I’m no good at math,” may translate to, “I’m worried I’m not smart.” Reflecting that feeling back to your child (“It sounds like you are wondering how you compare to the other kids, but I am so proud of you for always trying.”) can help them feel connected and understood. And with a little practice and a lot of love, you can be the person to help your child feel that way.

Mandi Melendez is a recent graduate of Texas State University’s Masters of Counseling program. She completed her counseling internship at NCWC in December 2013.

Recent

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  • Growing Tomatoes and PeopleMay 10, 2018 - 7:45 pm
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  • Do Not Believe Everything You Think!March 23, 2018 - 7:33 pm

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We are closed on Saturday and Sunday.

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12335 Hymeadow Drive
Suite 300
Austin, TX 78750

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Do Not Believe Everything You Think! Growing Tomatoes and People
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Effective immediately, Northwest Counseling is offering virtual IOP substance abuse programming via the Zoom video/audio conferencing platform.  Day and evening IOP program options are available.

Zoom provides HIPAA compliant, telehealth technology, allowing programming to occur with minimal interruption from your home or secure place of your choosing.  Connection to Zoom is easy. You will need a desktop, laptop, smart phone, or tablet, and an email address and a web connection to get started. On the day of your designated programming, go to the website Zoom.us, enter the meeting code (which we will provide) and join in. 

Virtual programming will deliver all the elements of an actual IOP including assessment, orientation, psychoeducational lecture, group process, contemplative practice, treatment planning, homework review, aftercare services, and more.  As is our custom, NCWC will continue to provide holistic healthcare and human connection necessary for recovery and well-being. While a less than preferred option, at this time of social distancing Zoom is a very safe and effective alternative.

 

Call us to get started. We can help. (512) 250-WELL (9355)

 

Some things to keep in mind:

Find a private, confidential, and quiet space with internet access during the hours of your programming.  

While Zoom is HIPAA compliant, your space may not be.  Please do not invite others into the therapy session.

Participate with group members as you would in an actual, on-site group therapy.  Do not ‘multi-task’ during IOP. Give your attention and respect to all group members.

We will give ample breaks during IOP sessions (do not use tobacco during therapy, take care of your restroom needs before group and during breaks).